Aged

What is it about getting older that makes us hate ourselves. I say "us" because I am sure I am not alone on this one. Maybe it is because as I get older, I mature ever so slightly and when this happens I tend to blame people less for the things that are wrong with my life. When I was a teenager and in my early twenties I blamed everyone else for my short comings and my failures. As time has passed I think I just started to be honest with myself. It isn't everyone else who is throwing up road blocks, it is me. You know that saying " you are your own worst enemy" Well I think whoever said that was over twenty five. So here's to self actualization, may it produce results where pointing fingers failed to do so. Cheers.

Around 7 pm

Sitting there with a lump the size of a golf ball in my throat, I manage to choke out the first unrehearsed sentence. "I didn't write a speech like some people do for this, I do have a couple things I want to say though". My eyes already welling up with tears and my stomach in knots, I continued, "This past year and a half has been wonderful. The years we shared before together, I didn't always treat you right" the first tear rolls down my left cheek. "It wasn't anything you did to cause it, I was simply immature and not ready for a serious relationship" her bottom lip begins to quiver "I needed to grow up a lot in order to get here, and I have grown, and we have grown together too" The first tear slides down her right cheek "Over this past year and a half I have realized that I never want to be without you again" a sob breaks the sentence "will you marry me?". A long embrace seals our vow.

Um, Hmm...

I accidentally posted on my original blog that I have never used till now. Enjoy!
http://ballsdeepinmyblog.blogspot.com/

Why is Sunny D so delicous!?

It's so good! I haven't posted anything in awhile so I thought I would give all you G's an update. Ehhm, ehm, mmm, today I took my first guitar lesson. It was pretty cool; he showed me some basic stuff that I need to practice. I have always wanted to play guitar, I just never had enough self confidence to try. Not that I suddenly stumbled upon a treasure trove of hidden confidence I never knew I had, I just figured I would stop being a pussy and do it all ready. "That's how you become great man; you hang your balls out there". I feel I have some music in me that needs to come out. I have always enjoyed singing but never had any sort of talent to speak of. I just want to be proud of myself you know. I suppose that is also why I took up photography, I want to be good at something god damn it! It's like Josh Homme said "Life is short, do it all". Merissa and I had another opportunity to go and take some shots of models, my pictures came out ok. I put some on my Flickr page if you want to take a gander. My favorite model of the day, however, wasn’t even on the clock. Take a look-see above! She has that "What the hell do you think you're doing" look on her face =D

Manic Homey

The laugh track is doing to comedy what AIDS is doing to Africa, F'ing it up! Why do we need to be told when we should laugh? Are we that dense? Perhaps we need to be informed that something is funny because it isn't in fact that funny! I remember watching one of my favorite shows "Ali G" recently and they added a laugh track to the American version. That show is freaking hilarious and the laugh track actually made it less funny. Show's are much better without the annoying droil of scripted laughter in the back ground. Much like grocery stores would be infinitely more pleasant without the politically correct music the play to drown out the sounds of whining children "but mommy I want it!". Take movies for example, they don't have laugh tracks, yet people still know when to laugh, well usually. Merissa and I were watching "I Love you Man" (which was hysterical) and there was this funny part that I laughed at but no one else in the theater did, that actually made the moment more funny to me. I won this Scrabble game by the way =P

The things you own end up owning you.

Capitalism has lead us into in age of disconnection. We are the children of the information age descended from the children of the space age. As society begins to plug in we as individuals begin to unplug. We are lead to believe that we are more connected now by using devices for mass communication like "Myspace", "Texting", or the newest culprit "Twitter". We believe we are brought closer to our fellow man by technology, but we are actually separated. We are separated from personal social interaction. I am sure you have been out in public and seen people acting blatantly rude without any regard for others around them. That is because we are not used to being around people as much anymore. Technology is also destroying our imaginations and the imaginations of our children. Instead of learning how to use our voices to make music, we now watch others on American Idol do what we ourselves have the ability to do. Instead of learning how to play an instrument, we now play Guitar Hero and pretend to be talented. Instead of going outside or going to a gym to excercise, we play "Wii Fit" with the hope to get a half assed workout. One may ask themselves "what is the point of creating when everything has already been created for me". What is the point of dreaming when everything is already dreamed for you. Children are parked in front of televisions and computer screens wasting their minds and their youth. Adults are wasting away in front of the very same devices that have their children enslaved. We watch other people lived rehearsed lives with scripted laughs and prerecorded sadness. When will we wake up from our conscious slumber and smash are masters electronic cages and break our minds free. When will we look around and realize that the status is not quo. Of course, the irony of my rant is that I am ranting on one of the very devices that I am condemning, C'est la vie. Who wants to play Xbox?!

Beautiful form fitter

Where to begin. I realize that an individual acting out against society, or ones family, or education is not truly lost, I believe they are trying to be found. By acting out via say, I don't know, imbibing hard drugs, one is merely trying to find their way back to the flock. We are in fact pack animals and by separating ourselves we are actually taking the long road back to human contact. The drug addict does smack. The drug addict get's arrested. The drug addict is prosecuted. The drug addict is made to go to support groups to find other recovering drug addicts to interact with. The drug addict reaches their destination, back into the arms of a parental figure, first the police officer, then the judge, then the support group. The violent criminal. The violent criminal breaks the law by committing acts of violence. The violent criminal is arrested. The violent criminal is prosecuted. The violent criminal is incarcerated. The violent criminal reaches his destination, he finds his father figure in the arms of the police officer, the judge, and in the prison shower with a man he calls daddy.